Thursday, September 11, 2008

Depressed emails and comments

Funny but I don't get many comments on here. What I do get is a lot of emails from people thanking me for telling my story, such as it is. It's not even anywhere close to done so all of the emails surprise me.

Most people tell me how glad they are that they came across my depressed blog and how it makes them feel to know they aren't the only ones things like this happened to.

I was just looking at the directory in Outlook, where my emails get sorted out and started rereading some of the ones I got when it struck me about the emails and comments.

I suppose it makes good sense as most people who are abused, beaten, sexually molested or abused and mentally abused just don;t want anyone else to know about it. That makes them afraid to leave a comment as they think someone might recognize them.

That's really sad that they are ashamed of something that happened to them that they had no control over.Yeah, I know all about that part of it. I didn't even begin to talk about it until I was 50 and that was at least 35 years after the fact.

I was always ashamed, worried about what other people would think of me, afraid they'd think I liked it or asked for it, etc. Well, like the people who email me, I hated it and like the vast majority of them, when I got old enough to do something about it, I did.

If I was still as depressed as I was when I started this blog about my life story I'd have burst into tears while I was reading the emails. Heh, at least writing this has helped me get a lot better.

I don't see myself as a helpful person and I didn't do this with the intent to help anyone but myself so the fact that I have kind of surprises me but I'm glad about it. It also makes me feel better and that's a nice thing.

Anyway, I hope the people who feel like they are the only ones things like this happened to start to post because then this place will help even more people. Reality is being abused happened to a lot of people, being sexually abused happened to a lot of people who are as old as I am.

Instead of being prosecuted back then it was hidden, usually in a conspiracy of family members to either deny it happened, blaming the child was also popular or just plain refusing to talk about it at all.

It would have embarrased a family way more back then that it does now, to have a child molestor in the family, and the whole family would have been talked bad about by most people and shunned or semi shunned by a whole lot of people.

So please help other people like you by posting a comment. If you want to feel more connected to a group who know how you feel then tell others about your experiences. It will make you feel better and it will help others.


Anonymous said...

I really want to thank you for the things you post about the abuse that happened to you.

Your story is a lot like mine and I'm so ashamed I can't talk about it to anyone. I'm even ashamed that I can't post my name or tell others about it. It's just to hard to think about or talk about.

Thanks again, your posts do help me and someday I'll be able to talk about my abuse but until then keep up the good things you are doing. I know it helps.

IMDepressed said...

Thanks, glad what I write helps you. I understand how hard it is to talk about and how thinking about it makes you feel. When you get tired of feeling the way you do and you talk about it, you will almost instantly feel better and it will get easier every time after that.

Believe me, talking about it is the best thing you can do to help yourself and stop feeling bad over something you had no control over.

On a similar note, this has been the most read post since I started this blog. Lol, y'all rushing to comment so fast I'm gonna have to limit it to the first 25 comments. ;)

Hang in there, eventually it will get better.

time heals all wounds said...

This is a really inspiring blog. I know you said that you didn't post all of these with the intention of helping anyone, but you really did!
Or at least you helped me.

I was molested by my older brother when I was very young, I'm 15 and have only recently told two people. In one of your older blogs when you talked about how you stood up to the people who hurt you, it was really inspiring. I know that if you overcame your problems, so will I. Thank you

IMDepressed said...

I'm glad what I had to say helped you. Find someone to talk to about it. Preferably a professional person who won't reveal what you told them. Then you don't have to worry about it getting out until you are ready.

Please understand it wasn't your fault. Don't blame yourself but do put the blame where it belongs. On the person who molested you.

I caught my second wifes oldest son moslesting his two younger brothers, one of whom was mentally and physically challenged and in special ed. He was gone from the house within two hours of discovering what he'd done. The two younger boys spent over a year going to a therapist and I think the future damage was minimized but it will always be with them.

Please tell someone what happened. Please talk to someone who can help you deal with it. You will have a much better life if you deal with it now.

Good luck and I wish you a great life in the future.

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