Thieves, cheats, liars and depression

I should have posted this before and I forgot. Between the beatings, the molestation, taking care of my sister and hiding from adults I also learned to lie, cheat and steal. I said I was old before my time and responsibility will to that to ya.

However I learned lying, cheating and stealing from adults. I might have stayed out of adults way as much as possible when I was a kid but I was always watching them and what they did. How they did it and who they did it to.

When my sister was old enough we'd get drug along to the bars sometimes and for sure if we stayed at my cousins at the lake for the weekend. I loved being in the bars. Good thing I did as everyone of my fathers generation, that I knew, was an alcoholic.

Funny but all the alcoholics I knew back then treated me better than my own parents. That didn't take much tho. None of them hit me, hurt me, called me names or molested me. Most were very nice to me and paid some attention to me.

Perhaps that's why I'm more comfortable in a bar today than I am anywhere else except at home. I seldom go into a bar anymore tho as I'm an alcoholic too. Wow, imagine that. I wonder how that happened. Lol, I don't abuse kids, I don't molest kids, I don't hit women but I didn't manage to avoid the alcoholic thing.

Considering I was raised my alcoholic, considering my mother put beer in my baby bottle when I was just a few weeks old and considering I got drunk on my own for the first time when I was 8 it's not to real surprising I turned out to be an alcoholic too.

Even tho the drunks treated me better than my parents they still lied, cheated and stole from each other. Almost all of them would talk about anything in front of me like I was to little or dumb to understand it. Not only did I understand it I could put 2 and 2 together and get 4. I was a watcher back then and I still have the habit now. Partly because of my upbringing and partly because of enemies I've made I won't sit anywhere that I don't have a commanding view of the room. Lol, it ain't paranoid if it's true. ;)

Even at my young age I stole a lot of money from drunken adults. Heh, they just figured they spent it anyway. I shoplifted comic books by the ton and candy. I steal a case of pop bottles from behind the bar and take them in the front door and get my refunds for them.

It was one way to make sure my sister and I didn't go hungry but even after I had enough to make sure that didn't happen I kept it up as I loved the thrill of being able to get over on adults. To say the least, it was exciting.

I could lie with the best of them and I was a pretty fair card cheat for years. Games and manipulation came to be second nature to me and I can play them better than most people. As I got older studying psychology and marketing just made me better at it, as did going to alcohol treatment.

So, by the time we moved to Sioux City I could lie, cheat, steal and manipulate with the best of them. Lol, while no one could make me cry I could cry on cue whenever I needed to. Kids crying is a great way to manipulate adults. It's also a great way for women to manipulate guys. Doesn't work all that well on me tho.

From the time we moved to Sioux City, while part of my life had gotten better, it was all downhill from there. My mother worked days and my grandmother watched my sister so I got to run the streets and run them I did. It was some of the greatest freedom I ever had. Me, loose in the biggest city I'd ever seen.

I don't remember being to unhappy there, school was boring but I was a year ahead of them, MN schools were way better than IA schools back in those days. I got to be an expert on both by the time I was 14. Back to the subject tho, running the streets at that age was one of the best times I ever had.

I still have a fondness for the place even tho later on in life some bad things happened to me there. I was quite successful at being a thief and never got caught for years.

I find it more than a bit amusing that some things I've posted no one knows anymore but me and the two other people who read this blog. ;) I was always told I should write my life story and that's probably what this will turn into. Lol, just wait until I discover sex in a few years. That made me forget all of my depression and it still can.