Depression as a survival mechanism

I heard two different versions of depression today. Lol, I really need to learn to leave the TV off.

The first version I heard was the depression is a survival mechanism in that it lets you know when you have been doing the wrong thing or things and is your bodies way or your minds way of telling you to stop.

Well, I'd agree with that in the fact that it does make you stop. Of course it makes you stop pretty much everything else to. Sometimes so much so that you cease bothering to even do the simple things that will keep you alive, like eating.

The other version I heard that depression was natures way of weeding out the weak and the useless. Severe depression would probably do that. Hmmm, I think I like the first version better because who wants to be thought of as weak and useless.

Unfortunately, in myself, I view my depression as weakness and my stupidity at letting it get so bad as even more weakness. I believe it is a change of chemical composition in the brain, as science says. But I also believe I should be able to control it with my mind. It's weakness when I can't. For most of my life I couldn't afford to show any weakness of any kind.

I don't believe it's a weakness in others tho. Nor do I think it's anything to be ashamed of. At least not for others. I'm glad to see that they finally switched the way depression is seen and the drugs for it are advertised.

A chemical imbalance in the brain is nothing to be ashamed of. Being thought of as not being able to cope with what life throws at you is. One is not your fault, one is.

Thankfully most people haven't experienced what I have nor have they done any research to see why they are so different from other people. Lol, because they aren't different so they didn't have to.

Some where along the way I learned a lot of things about how the mind works and what it can do. There is a lot of scientific proof that your mind can make you sick and a little about the fact it can also make you well. The Placebo effect probably being the most researched.

That's the part where my own weakness comes in. I know I should be able to control it and I'm not very successful at it. Of course after I get depressed I don't usually care if I can control it or not. However I should be able to recognize the signs that it's coming on and change it before I let it get so bad.

Heh, I can screw up an electrocardiogram just by slowing down or speeding up my heart rate. Yes, just by thinking about it. I got my cholesterol down to below where it needs to be just by thinking about it. I can totally ignore small pain and in general control large pain.

I'm constantly getting told I'm bleeding if I'm working outside or wow, where did you get that big bruise from. Lol, what bleeding, what bruise? I never notice or feel it.

Larger pain is a little different and I actually have to work at it to lessen it, isolate it or be able to ignore it. When the vertebrae in my neck changes it can take me up to two weeks to get control of the intense pain.

I know another thing about depression and that is that getting away from where you are when you get depressed will help. It always helps me to change my location. It helped a lot this time.

What I don't know is whetherdepression is a weakness or a survival mechanism. I could argue either side of that one. What I do know is that depression is a PITA.